We often think our problem is that we feel too much.
But in truth, many of us have simply forgotten how to feel safely.
When something painful arises – sadness, disappointment, confusion,
our first impulse is to escape it.
We rush to fix, explain, analyze, or distract ourselves.
And while that seems like control, it’s actually fear,
the fear of what we might experience if we stopped running.
Why We Avoid Feeling
Avoiding emotions is not weakness.
It’s protection.
At some point in our lives, feeling deeply may have felt dangerous,
too intense, too overwhelming, too lonely.
So our minds learned to build walls.
Those walls can look like perfectionism, constant busyness, overthinking, or numbness.
They all whisper the same message:
“If I stay in control, I won’t have to feel.”
But emotions are not enemies.
They are life moving through us, energy that wants to be seen, expressed, and released.
When we suppress them, we don’t find peace, we only freeze inside ourselves.
Safety Before Feeling
You cannot feel freely without first feeling safe.
The nervous system needs to know that it won’t be punished, judged, or abandoned for what it feels.
That’s why emotional healing never begins with “feeling more.”
It begins with building safety,
a sense of grounding in your body and trust in your own presence.
You can start by asking:
- Can I sit with myself for one quiet minute without distraction?
- Can I breathe into my chest and notice what’s there, without trying to fix it?
- Can I let this emotion exist for a moment, even if I don’t understand it?
The goal isn’t to change the feeling.
It’s to create space for it to exist.
How Mandala Practice Restores Emotional Flow
Mandala coloring offers a soft, contained way to return to feeling.
It’s not therapy in the traditional sense, it’s gentle re-connection.
The circle provides structure, a symbolic “safe room” for emotion.
Inside it, you can explore what you feel through movement, color, and rhythm,
without needing to name or explain anything.
When you move the pencil or brush slowly, your body begins to breathe again.
The nervous system receives the message: “It’s safe to stay.”
Little by little, the frozen energy starts to flow,
and emotions that once felt unbearable become textures of experience.
You may notice that certain colors call you.
You may start with gray and find yourself reaching for gold.
You may cry quietly, or feel nothing at all, both are part of healing.
Feeling returns naturally, once safety is restored.
A Simple Practice
When you sense that something inside you feels heavy or blocked,
try this:
- Sit with your mandala and close your eyes for a few breaths.
- Whisper to yourself: “It’s safe for me to feel. I can hold what I feel.”
- Choose one color that matches your current emotion, even if it’s dark.
- Begin coloring slowly, noticing your breath and the weight of your hand.
Don’t aim for beauty or meaning.
Just presence.
By the end, you may notice a subtle shift,
not a dramatic release, but a quiet thawing.
That’s how feeling returns, one safe breath at a time.